You are currently browsing the tag archive for the ‘ego’ tag.
The ground of being, awareness, presence – all names pointing to who we are beyond thought, time and space. In meditation we stop thought and this, our true nature, is revealed. In activity this ground of being or presence silently holds space, changeless and eternal and the substratum of all existence. Resting here, beyond thought, in meditation or not becomes a powerful place to direct our attention because it is our awakened state. The other day this question came up about presence:
“Isn’t presence like some sort of cheap escapism? I mean, I was having some restrospective thoughts, and sure I was feeling a little miserable, but then I felt better when going into presence, and yes, I feel OK now, but that doesn’t mean my problems aren’t still there, they are not going anywhere, I’m just basically ignoring them to experience this moment, I could very well be using this time to think about solutions, and try to punish myself into making some changes that could help me compensate for those regrets that won’t let me be happy. Also I’m sure once I stepped out of presence and start thinking again, reality is going to kick in, and it is going to remind me that I can’t change the past, and that the future looks tough, then I will feel miserable again until I find something else to distracts me. I don’t see how presence is going to solve anything, it only gives me a break, that’s all.”
Here is my response:
Ah, but presence is so much more than a break from our thinking minds – more than simply a moment of peace. Presence is an expansive field of awareness with infinite depth. As we spend more and more time here this Presence grows in us. We merge with it and become it, and we begin to know it intimately as our own true nature.
It’s not that presence itself solves our problems, but out of it can arise an intuitive sense, or even a direct knowing, of a way forward that is beyond what the lower polarized mind might tell us. By detaching from what Buddhists call the “monkey mind”, we begin to enjoy the peace, and also the heightened perception, that goes along with it. Our lives begin to change in expansive ways, and the practice of presence becomes our joy.
Poet and mystic Edward Carpenter in his collection of poetry, Towards Democracy, beautifully describes the quiet power of this inner presence in his poem:
NOW IS THE ACCEPTED TIME
Amid all the turmoil and the care – the worry, the fever, the anxiety
The gloomy outlook, fears, forebodings,
The effort to keep up with the rush of supposed necessities, supposed duties,
The effort to catch the flying point of light, to reach the haven
of Peace – always in the future –
Amid all, glides the little word Now.
As when the winds of March with their long brooms sweep the dead leaves from the surface of the ground, and the Earth in virgin beauty with the growing grass once more appears;
So when all this debris of thought from the Past, of anxiety about the Morrow, is at last swept away,
Does the vast ever-Present beneath reveal its perfect rondure.
Photo: Rick Erbach
In my mentoring work we often address issues of self-esteem. Fundamental to the structure of the human ego is the polarity of worthy and worthless, so at some point we all must grapple with the teeter-totter of emotions this polarity elicits. The question that most often comes up is “How do I stop putting myself down and boost my self-esteem and confidence?”
The simplest solution I can share is to believe in yourself! I know, easier said, than done! But these deeply conditioned beliefs about yourself being less than and inferior were imprinted in childhood and are not true. If growing up we did not feel validated by our caregivers (parents, teachers etc.), and, particularly, if we were criticized repeatedly, we did not develop a healthy self-esteem, imprinting a sense of inadequacy. Over time we internalize that critical voice, and putting ourselves down becomes an unconscious habit or program (much like a computer program) with a life of its own!
The truth is inherent in our essential nature we each have untapped potential waiting to be realized… if we only had the eyes to see it! Fortunately, there is something we can do to sharpen our vision. This involves three steps 1.Witnessing . 2. Detaching 3. Affirming
Begin to Witness, or become aware of, your negative self-talk and scolding. By developing a witness to the program/habit it no longer operates unconsciously. When we make it conscious we are withdrawing its power over us. The next step is to Detach from it by reminding yourself that these limiting thoughts come from your childhood conditioning and they are not who you are! Finally, Affirm what is true about you beyond what this critical inner voice is telling you.This important step is about reprogramming the subconscious mind. You can say something like “I am whole and complete just as I am with my own unique potential.” Then, let this become your mantra.
Do these three steps each time your inner critic rears its unwanted head! Because you are reprogramming your consciousness by detaching from your negative thought-steam the grip it has over you will diminish over time. Gradually, your eyes will begin to open to the possibility that there is more to you than you have been seeing, and you will discover a new inner spaciousness. In this spaciousness you will begin to view the challenges in your life from a more balanced and less polarized perspective. You will begin to accept negative experiences without self-judgement and to learn from them. The courage to take on new projects will follow, and with your successes you will begin to develop faith and trust in your own innate abilities and new-found potential. Your formerly elusive self-confidence will begin to take hold and go and grow from here.
[For more on this topic see the post “Seeing Through Worthlessness” on this blog]
The subject of money comes up a lot with individuals I work with…. there never seems to be enough of it! But the truth is the Universe is the source of unlimited supply! Oneness is all there is – one unified field of consciousness that gives rise to all creation. Love, light and abundance naturally flow from this Oneness, and money in this world is simply a tangible, material representation of this flow. It is also true that our conditioned beliefs around money block its flow into our lives.
How many times have you heard there is never enough to go around, or every man for himself? If you believe that these statement are true – if you believe in lack – lack is what you will manifest. Instead, what if you were to believe there is plenty for everyone, and when I choose to help others less fortunate than I, my selfless actions are a win-win?
Our negative and limiting belief systems about money come from egoic consciousness, or the consciousness of separation, which is illusory, and as such, can be processed and cleared. Even better we can fast-track the purification of the ego/mind though direct action, bringing immediate benefit to our lives and the lives of others. This practice is called Karma Yoga, or the act of giving without thought of reward.
When we share what we have, whether it is our money, our talents and expertise, or if we simply reach out in some way to someone in need, our hearts open. Beautiful and uplifting in itself, but in the open heart we actually open to a flow of abundance from the Universe. And when we give selflessly, with no thought of reward, the purity of this gesture amplifies its potency.
With the inward drawing energies of the fall and winter season upon us now, we are afforded the opportunity to grow on this area. As the days grow shorter we are naturally drawn together with family and friends to celebrate the holiday season. Spirit calls us into our hearts to commune, to share, and to give, and in our giving we have the perfect opportunity to practice Karma Yoga.
By opening our hearts to others though the practice of selfless giving we increase the spiritual power of even the simplest of benevolent acts. We create a win-win with blessings all around!
We come into this world with a psyche that is split into separation from our true divine nature, and the blueprint for ego becomes instituted. The story of Adam and Eve describes this spilt as our fall from grace. But it never really happened! It’s all maya – illusion – and becomes our inner journey toward awakening to the truth of who we are. Beyond ego and the lower mind lies our true spiritual nature as limitless and timeless beings. But because the ego is defined by the electro-magnetic charges of negative and positive, duality, and specifically loss and gain, are born in the mental and emotional bodies. So loss and gain are programmed into our consciousness from the get go becoming an unconscious lens through which we view the world.
In fact, if I could distill into a single egoic construct all of the processes that people come to me wanting to clear, it would be loss and gain. This is true because the relative mind will interpret any negativity in one’s life as a loss, whether it’s a material “loss” of some kind, some heavy state in the emotional body, or simply a loss of happiness. Sure, losses and gains are part of life – they seem very real in this world. But this is only the mind’s superficial reading of what’s going on; it is the dual mind’s interpretation of the natural ebb and flow of life. In truth, our natural state of wholeness and oneness is complete in itself: paraphrasing my teacher, nothing can ever be added to or taken away from that which we are!
What if we could stand “outside” of the natural rhythms of life and just watch? Rather than getting pulled into and identifying with a story around loss and gain, we watch and witness the movement of energy in our emotional body. This neutral witness is grounded in being. It’s identity is as spiritual presence. When we know ourselves to be that still presence – unchanging and eternal – then the ups and downs of life occur, but they don’t shake the ground of being that we are. Our deepest knowing from the place is that the invisible realms always support us and that the Universe is the source of unlimited supply! Loss and gain are real for you only when you believe them to be true. Granted this is a paradigm shift in the way we see the world, and so it becomes a process of undoing and reprogramming the limited mind.
The witness, or neutral observer is our ally here. By pro-actively witnessing or catching the contracting energy in the mind or emotional body, and then consciously choosing not to buy into it we create an little expansion and an ascension. We are detaching from ego and opening to what is true beyond it, which is our divine nature waiting to be unveiled! It is also helpful at this point to remind our lower selves of our unlimited spiritual nature with an affirmation, such as I am Spirit, I am divine and I am always supported.
So, practically, this is how it might play out in your life: You seem to incur a material loss of some kind – the IRS notifies you that you are in errs and wants you to pay more taxes, perhaps. You can consciously choose from your neutral witnessing presence not to take it as a loss. Rather, you can choose to step out of an egoic response and see it as a temporary ebb in the flow, reminding yourself that the Universe has your back, always. You have faith because you know that the tide will turn eventually, and, especially, if you are able to remain open and centered and not contract emotionally, it will happen sooner rather than later!
Negative emotions will also feel like a loss to the ego.The entire structure of our emotional body is based on negative and positive, loss and gain. So even the slightest drop of our awareness into negativity, say self-doubt, perhaps, will register as a loss. Unless we are able to witness it! If we can catch self-doubt as it slips into our awareness and detach from the story we are telling ourselves about it, we won’t make it real and unconsciously feed energy in to it. We can, instead, align with our center and allow all feelings, however negative (or positive), to pass through the still Presence that we are – never diminished or increased, but always full, complete and content in itself!
In a discussion group the other day someone asked “Is there any one thing we can do on a daily basis, besides meditation, that will help us grow spiritually?” I felt into the question for a moment and the answer quickly floated into my awareness from my core: neutrality. “Yes. Practice neutrality,” I answered.
In truth, all wisdom, all inner knowing that we seek, emerges from our alignment with our spiritual core. And it is the practice of neutrality that takes us there. Neutrality naturally and effortlessly aligns our awareness/consciousness with a column of golden-white light that exists in our subtle body, or energy body. In Sanskrit it is called the shushumna, and it sits just in front of the physical spine and parallel to it, extending from head to toe and beyond – to the center of the galaxy above, as well as to the earth below. It is the gateway to higher consciousness and to the wisdom that exists outside of ego and our egoic limitations.
So it is through the practice of neutrality throughout our day, moment to moment, that silences the egoic mind with its desires and fears, its likes and dislikes, and allows our awareness to come to rest. Peace, balance, equanimity, trust, faith, and more are the states of being that we find there.
What does it mean to be neutral…practically? How do we do neutrality? As my teacher often says, to be neutral is to be neither attracted to or repulsed by anything. With our Observer as our viewing point we watch the inevitable dramas of life play out, noticing our reactivity, noticing if and how we are pushed and pulled by our thoughts and emotions. Can we hold the higher mind and simply watch what is unfolding without identifying with it? If emotion is present can we allow it to be there without being pulled into reactivity? This is neutrality and the doorway into the peace at our core in the shushumna. By resting here more and more our consciousness will ascend.
Awhile back I was on the phone and verbally assaulted by someone. I was belittled and shamed and essentially told (with many more hateful words!) that I was incompetent and worthless. When I reminded this person that their unhappiness came from the choices they have made in life and not from me, they hung up the phone! Throughout the call I was able to witness the barrage from the higher neutral mind and see that these accusations were projections coming for this person’s inner pain and disconnect. My immediate internal response was forgiveness. That said, my emotional body felt shattered, as you might guess, after such a violent assault. My reaction was to breath deeply to allow the charged energy to dissipate and to go for a brisk walk.
Do you see how I was able to remain neutral, even while my emotional body was activated? If my response had been to go into anger and blame and verbally retaliate in some way, I would have lost my neutral observer. I would have been identified with the story, and by taking a side or a position I would have created a relationship of polarity with “the other”. I would have been in egoic consciousness and had a personal issue to process and clear.
.
So by making a commitment to neutrality, putting it into practice as best we can, and processing our shortcomings we strengthen our neutral observer overtime. We begin to spend more time in our core state and with the peace and balance that we find there. Our ascension in consciousness begins and grows from here.
embracingOneness Blog 